Whatever happened to Creepy Joe?

You remember the old horror movie about two creepy old ladies played by Bette Davis and Joan Crawford where you are never sure which one is creepier?

It was called “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?” and it told the story of two washed-up, has-been actresses who are caught between their memories of the halcyon days of stardom and the rancid squalor of their hate-filled rivalry.

That’s kind of the situation we face in the Democratic primary. Between 78-year-old Crazy Bernie Sanders and 77-year-old Creepy Joe Biden, Democrats need to decide if it’s safe to enter the voting booth. No wonder a lot of Dems are turning to Pete Buttigieg and Amy Klobuchar for comic relief.

Bernie has the cranky old man down part down pat. He’s a stereotype in search of a bad sitcom. Karl Marx meets the Wolfman. And Joe has gone all drooling sexpot septuagenarian on us. When he grabs any woman younger than 65, forgive us for wondering if we need to call a cop.

Sadly this political Odd Couple remake may be over soon. Biden just got run over in New Hampshire, and crawled his way to South Carolina like a cat that was hit by a car and dragged its mangled body someplace safe to die. Fifth place? Nine percent?

Whatever happened to Creepy Joe?

Now the really scary part of this horror movie: Crazy Bernie is in the driver’s seat, and he’s driving a hundred miles an hour toward the White House! Mayor Pete better watch out or he’ll wind up in the same ditch as the dead cat. Yuck!


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